I fantasise about us having dinner. Or drinking. Like we always do. I say something or don't say something. Or nothing prompts it, but there is an out of body change. An aggression or expression. You drag me from my seat by my hair. Yanking me to the floor. I lie in a heap, you spit on me and kick my ribs. You tell me I'm a worthless fucking slut, a waste of space, always desperate for sex, a slave to my desires, not yours. You tell me I'm nothing but a piece of shit and push your shoe down onto my cheek to prove it.
My head is pinned to the cold tiled floor. You yank up my dress. Pull down my knickers. I try to keep my legs closed. You try to prize them open. Your nails sink into my flesh. You push your foot down hard on my head. I feel like my skull will crack. You pull at my thighs again and I relent to the pain, you thrust several fingers inside me.
My cunt is dry and unreciprocating. Tight with fear. You laugh at me from your crouched position. It's a dead, flat cackle. You rub at me and hurt me. You remove your fingers from me and jam them down my throat. I begin to gag as spit is racked up from my insides. You repeatedly push on my tongue until your fingers are oozing with white froth and vomit. You pinch my nose hard. I start to splutter and gasp and wiggle and try to free myself. You let go and smack me across the face.
You remove your fingers from my mouth and jam them into my arse. I yelp. It's painful. You laugh at me again.
"Such a filthy little arse hole, You're a disgusting little bitch".
You remove your foot and yank me up by my hand. My legs are weak and dizzy. You throw me over the table. I hear you unzip your slacks. You knock my thighs wider apart with your knee, you pull the cheeks of my bottom roughly apart and slide into my arse. I feel the searing burn of splitting skin. You growl at me, thrust hard. Deep and aggressive.
"I bet you're even enjoying this. You're not good enough to fuck."
You hold still for a second. Im shaking. I feel that familiar warmth of urine start to pool inside me. It stings from the ravaged cuts you've made. Tears flood from my red, ugly face. You pull out. Smearing excess effluent onto my dress.
You yank my head up again and spin me around. You repeatedly smack my cheeks and cunt and it's confusing and painful. I catch sight of your cock, hard and glistening with blood and spit and effluent debris. You catch my gaze.
"Is that what you want you filthy whore? My shit covered cock in your mouth. You're fucking priceless".
You clip my legs with a flick of your foot and I drop to my knees. Bang on the hard tiles. Your hands are instantly at the sides of my head. Holding my skull. The pressure makes my head ache. You guide me towards your cock. I won't open my mouth. You hit my face. I gasp. You slide yourself into me. You hold my nose with one hand and pull down my jaw with the other repeatedly thrusting deep into my throat. I can barely breath. Vomit begins to trickle down my chin. Spit foams in my mouth. I'm desperate to escape. I can't breath at all. Is this real? I piss myself in fear and from repeatedly retching. I hear you breathing hard from above me, lusting for release. You cover my throat in come. It shoots straight down to my stomach.
You pull out from my mouth and rub any excess I may have missed into my hair and face. You spit on me one last time and I hear your zip slide up. I'm hazy. I'm not sure what's happened. Im breathing hard. I hear you walk away. You flick the light switch off. I'm on the floor in complete darkness. Im aching and bleeding and I smell like vomit. I hear you climb the stairs into the living room. I hear the scratch of your lighter. Cigarette smoke coils its way into my nostrils. I'd give anything for a cigarette. I remain on the floor. I'm afraid to get up. My tears start to settle. I'm cold and I itch. I hear you climb the second set of stairs and shut the bedroom door. I hear you settle in our bed warm and safe. You don't come back.
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